How to be Happy: are you feeling unhappy in your life and finding a way to feel happy? I had been researching about this topic many years ago. One important realization is that happiness is truly within my control. It is a decision that comes within us that we want to be happy. And we cannot rely on external factors/people in order to be happy. The reason is simple, because we have no control over it. Happy can be as easy as just feeling grateful for whatever things we have right now in life.
Below is what I learnt from Tony Robbins about A New Blueprint for Happiness.
How To Be Happy: A New Blueprint Inspired by Tony Robbins
In the pursuit of happiness, many of us chase external things—more money, career success, or the “perfect” relationship. But as Tony Robbins teaches, happiness isn’t about what we acquire or achieve; it’s about the quality of our mindset and the beliefs we hold about ourselves and life. Here’s a look at Tony Robbins’ “New Blueprint for Happiness” and how you can apply his insights to lead a happier, more fulfilling life.
What’s Your Blueprint for Happiness?
According to Robbins, each of us has a personal “blueprint” for happiness—a set of beliefs and expectations about how life should be. When life aligns with our blueprint, we feel fulfilled and happy. However, when reality doesn’t match our expectations, frustration and unhappiness can follow. The key to lasting happiness is creating a flexible, empowering blueprint that supports a joyful life, regardless of external circumstances.
And in today’s world, we often find ourselves chasing after an elusive idea of happiness, influenced by societal norms that dictate what “success” should look like. We’re taught that only extraordinary achievements are worthy of recognition, yet this perspective is flawed. Why do we value celebrities over everyday heroes like teachers or stay-at-home parents, who play invaluable roles in shaping our society? Happiness cannot be tied solely to conventional markers of success, and the pursuit of happiness must be a personal journey, guided by our passions and values rather than societal expectations.
Redefining Happiness Beyond Expectations
Our expectations—both for ourselves and others—often set us up for disappointment and frustration. When we measure happiness based solely on whether our lives align with a rigid “blueprint” of success, we risk overlooking genuine moments of joy and fulfillment. This fixed blueprint creates a “happiness trap” where we equate unmet expectations with failure. True happiness isn’t about achieving perfection; it’s about embracing life as it is and creating a unique path that resonates with who we truly are.
Rather than fearing pain and setbacks, Tony Robbins encourages using challenges as opportunities for growth. Pain is often perceived as failure, but in reality, it is a necessary catalyst for self-improvement. By facing our fears and learning from our struggles, we become resilient and better equipped to pursue authentic happiness. Rather than running from pain, we should embrace it as a guide to adjust our expectations and evolve our “blueprint.”
The Power of Letting Go and Moving On
One of the greatest obstacles to happiness is the fear of letting go—whether it’s releasing a past version of ourselves, unmet expectations, or rigid beliefs about success. Letting go is a freeing experience that allows us to make space for new sources of joy. Contrary to common belief, letting go doesn’t mean giving up or no longer caring; it simply opens the door to the possibility of a joyful life. When we detach our happiness from external factors, we gain control over our inner peace.
The story of Enhamed Enhamed, a blind Paralympic swimmer from Spain, illustrates this beautifully. Enhamed once saw his blindness as a limitation, a barrier preventing him from living a fulfilling life. However, after encountering Tony Robbins’ work, he realized that his condition didn’t define him; it was his mindset that held him back. By shifting his blueprint and deciding to see blindness as an inspiration rather than a limitation, Enhamed found happiness and went on to achieve remarkable success, winning multiple Paralympic gold medals. His story teaches us that, when our reality doesn’t match our blueprint, we have two choices: change our circumstances or change our perspective.
Actionable Steps to Create Your Own Happiness
Here are ten practical ways to break free from rigid expectations and cultivate true happiness:
- Do What You Love: Engage in work or hobbies that resonate with you. Passion drives fulfillment.
- Stop Comparing: Your happiness journey is unique. Focus on your own progress and joy, not others’.
- Make a Joy List: Write down activities that bring you happiness and revisit them regularly.
- Surround Yourself with Positive People: Your environment shapes you. Spend time with those who uplift you.
- Adopt a Gratitude Mindset: Practicing gratitude shifts focus to the positive, enhancing mood and relationships.
- Give to Others: Acts of kindness create joy for both the giver and receiver.
- Plan Something to Look Forward To: Scheduling small future rewards, like a coffee date or trip, provides motivation and joy.
- Create Meaningful Experiences: Share activities you love with others to build lasting memories.
- Learn to Say No: Respecting your boundaries helps you prioritize what truly matters to you.
- Take Time for Yourself: Regular “me time” keeps you grounded and connected to your inner needs.
Embracing Your Unique Path to Happiness
True happiness comes from following your passions, maintaining realistic expectations, and cultivating resilience. Life isn’t happening to us; it’s happening for us, as Robbins often says. When we let go of expectations and follow our hearts, we unlock the potential for joy in every moment. Happiness isn’t a destination but a mindset—a conscious choice to live authentically, embrace challenges, and find beauty in life’s imperfections.
Are you ready to redefine your path to happiness? By letting go of outdated expectations, you can start creating a life that feels genuinely fulfilling. Remember, the journey to happiness is unique to each of us, so take these steps at your own pace and watch your happiness grow.
Final Thoughts
Happiness, as Tony Robbins teaches, is about creating a fulfilling life from the inside out. By reshaping your blueprint for happiness and aligning your beliefs, focus, and actions with this new blueprint, you’ll build a foundation for lasting joy. Remember, happiness is a choice and a practice, not an endpoint. Start small, be consistent, and watch your life transform.
Implementing these steps inspired by Tony Robbins can help you cultivate true happiness, no matter your circumstances. Adjust your mindset, align your life with your values, and choose growth, gratitude, and connection every day.
Additional resources on How to Be Happy: read Happy is Easy by Bryan K.